Hi! I’m Elaine (Lainey), and this is the story of how I met Michael, the quirky, fun gem that is my Yorkshire husband, chronicling the highlights (and lowlights) of an “elder” Millennial, attending uni and grad school, growing up in an era of body image conflicts, feminism shifts, and reconciling my experience in the deep South of Georgia and Florida versus my childhood in the north of England. It’s the story of friendships, of journeys, of growth, of how we form our impressions of each other and the world.
It’s my journey from serial dating disaster to divorcée to happily married human, navigating life and grief along the way.
My very own rom com in reverse.
Where to start?
Take a gander at the past chapters of my real-life rom-com (in reverse).
I had the high school sweetheart; the hot, muscular university bestie (Chester) whom I never dated (but maybe should have); a couple of one-night stands; and made lots of wrong choices (often because of misplaced attraction and good action between the sheets). And that was just through university.
I hooked up with more than one of my university professors as well as my hot neighbour (and ghosted him); met a man with the largest (cough) appendage I’ve ever seen (as thick as a Coke can and as long as a ruler); met no fewer than four men at Starbucks; and dated someone I met at a conference who wound up dead (unrelated to me).
I had one failed marriage as a military wife, and all the wrong turns led me to Michael, my amazing Yorkshire husband.
You can find all the Why We Met chapters in one place here.
Check out some select chapters below:
#1 WHY AM I WRITING “WHY WE MET”?
#8 CAPTAIN CAMBRIDGE: THE MAN WITH THE MASSIVE APPENDAGE
#9 HOW I MET MY HIGH SCHOOL SWEETHEART
#10 A STARRY WALK TO REMEMBER WITH THE AIR TRAFFIC CONTROLLER
#11 WHEN I SLEPT WITH MY CRUSH’S BEST FRIEND – AND THEN HE WROTE A POEM SAYING IT MEANT NOTHING
#13 HOW I LOST MY VIRGINITY TO MY HIGH SCHOOL SWEETHEART
#14 THAT GUY WHO RANTED ABOUT HIS EX-WIFE ON OUR DATE (AND I SAW HIM ON ANOTHER DATE IN STARBUCKS)
#17 I KISSED A GIRL AND I LIKED IT: A THREESOME TALE
#18 THE DATE WITH THE GUY WHO WORKS FOR A HUGE TECH COMPANY, A MAN WHOM I’LL FOREVER ADORE
#20 THE RED-HAIRED SEX GOD: HOW THINGS ENDED, AKA THAT TIME I WENT FULL BLOWN HOT-CRAZY SCALE
#21 THAT TIME I DATED (AND GHOSTED) MY FIREFIGHTER NEIGHBOUR
#22 MY BEST DATE EVER WITH THE FINANCE CFO (BEFORE HE BECAME THE HOT-SHOT CFO)
#27 WHEN I F*CKED THE MARRIED PROFESSOR: HOW KARMA BIT ME IN THE ANKLE
#28 THE ONE WHO REMINDED ME OF PATRICK BATEMAN, THE FSU FILM STUDENT: WHY I WANTED TO BE INTO HIM
#36 AN INDECENT PROPOSAL: THE US ARMY SERGEANT WHO WENT DOWN ON ME – OUR SECRET AGREEMENT
#37 THE GUY WITH THE FAKE EYE: THE KISS BOYS
#39 THE HOT SCANDINAVIAN LIT PROFESSOR: HOW WE MET AND WHY HE DROPPED ME LIKE A HOT POTATO
#42 THAT TIME I (KIND OF) HAD SEX ON A BOAT WITH ONE OF THE INTERNATIONAL BOYS
#43 THE REALLY, REALLY HOT ONE, AKA THE SECOND PERSON I MET AT STARBUCKS
#49 THAT TIME I HAD A ONE-NIGHT STAND WITH SOMEONE I PICKED UP AT TARGET
#51 CAPTAIN COTILLION, THE HANDSOME DEBUTANT
#52 THE AIR FORCE GUY WHO ALMOST RUINED MY MARRIAGE: THE GUY WHO CROPPED UP THREE TIMES
#58 THE HOT JEWISH DOCTOR: THE BEGINNING
#65 THE CHINESE AMERICAN DOCTOR: WHY I MESSED THIS UP
#70 THAT OTHER ONE NIGHT STAND WHOSE NAME I BARELY RECALL: THE CAPTAIN WHO KISSED MY SHOULDER
#72 HOW I MET MY (EX) HUSBAND, AKA THE FOURTH PERSON I MET AT STARBUCKS
#90 HOW I MET MY YORKSHIRE HUSBAND: PART ONE
And more…
Here for my publishing journey?
I have written a book, THE BROKEN ENGAGEMENT CLUB (longlisted for the 2025 Mslexia Novel Competition), that is currently out on submission with the Big Five, hoping to find its home.
You can read about that journey here:
HOW MY DELUSION CAUSED ME TO WRITE (FINISH) MY (HOPEFULLY DEBUT) MANUSCRIPT
ONE YEAR IN, THE THINGS I SUBMITTED, READING, BANK HOLIDAYS, AND TAKING THE RING TO MORDOR
I’M GOING TO REVEAL A SECRET…MY PSYCHIC, ZETA, ADVISED ME TO START MY SUBSTACK
36 HOURS AFTER SENDING MY QUERY TO AN AGENT, HERE’S WHAT HAPPENED
SEEKING AN AGENT AND MY PUBLISHING JOURNEY UPDATE
IT’S OFFICIAL: I’M NOW AN AGENTED (FUTURE) AUTHOR
Guest posts on Kristen Weber’s Inside an Editor’s Brain
Kristen Weber is the developmental editor, former Big 5 editor (Penguin and Hachette), who helped me polish my manuscript for querying and publication. I’m still using her expertise for the second of three manuscripts I wrote before going on submission. This next one is called either Oriella Wants a Golden Retriever Boyfriend or Wanted Golden Retriever Boyfriend.
The Power of Developmental Editing
Querying Is Brutal (But This Worked)
Publishing recommendations
Kristen Weber at Inside an Editor’s Brain for free writing and publishing advice.
Charlotte Stephens at Baby Brain for parenting and pop culture advice plus Substack branding. She helped me with my redesign and new content pillars. Brilliant advice. Now I need to pop all the strategies in place.
Java Ceridwen Bere at From Java with Love, an inspiring artist and creative, who helped me overhaul my Instagram in preparation for author life.
Phoebe Morgan at Honest Editor for insights into the publishing world.
Katherine Clements at The Inkwell for a brilliant writing community, real publishing advice, and book coaching from an author and coach.
Evelyn Skye and Joanna Phoenix at Creative, Inspired, ALIVE for magical inspiration and glimpses behind-the-scenes, timelines of writing a manuscript to sending out ARCs to launch day and more.
Jenna Satterthwaite at Author + Agent + Human for an insider look at all things agenting, authoring, and publishing. Some juicy inside tea!
Kathleen Schmidt at Publishing Confidential on all things publicity in publishing.
Personal recommendations
Allison Raskin at Emotional Support Lady and her husband John Blakeslee at Wrong Man for the Job for honest, funny writing. I’ve been a long-time fan of Allison’s works since her Buzzfeed and Just Between Us Days (with Gabe Dunn).
Franco Amati at Garbage Notes for brilliant modern poetry and explanations. I don’t often ‘get’ poetry but everything Franco, a New York City-based poet, writes is incredible.
Dr Hannah Harris at Doorknob Confessions for a doctor’s take on life and humour and her cancer (free) journey.
Wendy Varley at Wendy’s World for a beautiful memoir-like look at a magazine editor’s life who had twins (plus other children) and all the interesting and incredible points she shares from her own diary to that of her late Yorkshire-based mother.
Dr Barbs Honeycutt at Where are you from, and why? for a look at a brave PhD-weilding Italian immigrant’s journey to find love in Australia with her quirky, fun interests shared to boot. Hilarious.
Maya Misikir at Sifter for her take as a freelance journalist on Ethiopian news, politics, culture, and human rights.
Diane Roth at A New Wrinkle for her humours look at Gen X life. Funny anecdotes about her life as a writing professor and parent.
Diana M. Wilson at Wit and Wisdom for an ex-CEO and business coach’s look at life. Plenty of wit and wisdom. Just what it says on the tin.
Poorna Bell at As I Was Saying… one of my fav Substackers/authors/journalists on the platform.
Katie Lee of My Top Secret Project, mystery and sci fi author, award-winning screenwriter, BAFTA nominee, and quirky, charming, funny human with brilliant stories on her publication.
Emma Kriskinans of Scrambled Eggs, future author and culture round-up writer, 60-minute book club pioneer, essays, and existential questions from a techie genius.
Thanks for reading.
Love and best wishes, Lainey
I’m going to dive into this tomorrow, Elaine. Thank you so much for the kind mention. x
Thanks for the nod, Elaine! You're the best!