#35 THE VIKING, THE MAN I DATED(?) BUT DON’T REMEMBER
#35 THE VIKING, THE MAN I DATED(?) BUT DON’T REMEMBER
The guy I saw a few times but totally do not remember
I couldn’t read this full post from
of A Writer’s Notebook but what I could read, I resonated with; I’m (unfortunately) currently maxed out budget-wise on my Substack paid subscriptions for other writers (I pay out more indeed than I make for my own Substack). She wrote about unreliable narration and the master of all unreliable narrators Nabokov’s Humbert Humbert of Lolita fame, proclaiming “all essayists are unreliable narrators” in their own way and memory is prone to error:“We rely on our memories, and memory is fallible—to what extent can it be trusted?” –
And it made me think about my own writing on here and its relationship to “the truth” and reliability. Can my memory be trusted to tell the story of my own life? The answer is nuanced and somewhere along the spectrum of both “yes” and “no.”
She also notes that, “Not all unreliable narrators are liars, monsters, or people who want to be seen in a better light.” All this is to note is that even though I have actual snippets of texts, things I’ve written down during the time in question, and notes I’ve taken over the years of memories, much of what I’ve written on my Substack can be taken as semi-unreliable. I am also an unreliable narrator, even if unintentionally.
As I’m writing it, it’s true to me. I’m writing what I remember. How I felt at the time. But I’m also writing sometimes with only part of the picture. Sometimes, I’ve had a chance to speak with some of the people I’ve written about to get their perspective, to get their side of things, and other times I don’t have that. Knowing the other side has left my memory with a richer tapestry. But that may also colour the re-telling. I was also young back then, sometimes (often) selfish, following my libido and (sometimes) sketchy morals, in my way learning, growing and exploring the world around me: figuring out this whole new thing called adulthood. Finding my way.
But overall, I’d like to think the core of my personhood was generally trying to be a kind, warm-hearted person. Did I always succeed at that? Maybe not (as evinced by sleeping with my housemate’s on-and-off-again boyfriend and that married professor). But I forgive past me for her explorations of the world.
I digress.
Sometimes, when running across messages past me typed out to myself (on Facebook and email, etc), I find entire people that I have not an ounce of memory about and The Viking is one such person.
As such, I’ll have to relay the story from the only pieces of evidence I have. It’s like one of those stories where you wake up and you have amnesia and no memories and you have to piece together your life via clues: as in films like Memento, The Vow, 50 First Dates, and books such as The Woman Who Stole My Life (Marian Keyes) and What Alice Forgot (Liane Moriarty).
Leif, The Viking
In my emails, I called this man “the viking.” His name was Leif. That’s his actual real name. I’m only assuming I called him that because his name reminded me of the viking Leif Eriksson. Leif and Leif have something in common: I remember zero about their history.
I generally give people I post about pseudonyms on here. Sometimes like for High School Sweetheart (HSS), Air Traffic Controller (ATC), and Captain Cambridge, I haven’t even given them made up people names; their identity is tied into what they do or their relationship to me. Others have been given faux names like Theo, Dorian, Charles, and Bramwell. I wanted to protect them because, well, I don’t want them to be able to be identified unless they want to be. There’s freedom in anonymity and maybe they just don’t want to be part of my sordid saga (only because it rhymed – I’m definitely not slut shaming myself).
For poor Leif, however, I have no identity to protect as I don’t know this man. I didn’t have sex with him because he’s not on my list. Did I kiss him? Also, not sure. He is also not on that list.
So here goes…
“Warriorwoodsman” messaged me on OkCupid.
It was August 2011. I had moved very recently to Columbus, Georgia. I am not sure how this guy fits in with other people I dated from OkCupid but I know that in Valdosta I maybe only dated a couple of people from online – Patrick Bateman being one and an Air Force guy another, with the latter being a bit more “successful” than the former in that he was a little more human (and better looking).
25 August 2011, early evening
Leif: I think that you might be interesting. Should I message you?
I’m guessing this witty start was to do with whatever shite I had written on my profile.
Elaine: Maybe you should; however, you clearly state for women to "keep moving" if they do not like to "get dirty." I honestly do not see the point in getting mucky and staying that way. I'm not much of a camper. I can handle camping for a couple of days; I especially enjoy camp-fire breakfasts, but more than that is just torture and it's much worse (or impossible) if there's no running water.
26 August 2011, early afternoon
Leif: I'm right there with you on not staying dirty or being dirty for long periods of time >2 days. I however do own horses and I like to play in the rain and mud puddles. I have lived way too many years without the comfort of a bed and a regular shower, so I'm not hugely a fan of unnecessary suffering. I just have known one too many people that will not swim in anything but a pool.
We can still be friends, but if I can't give you a big sweaty hug after working in the yard, garden, workshop, etc then more than a friendship is not meant to be. ;)
Oh. And did you work for Disney? I just wondered about your central Florida.
Sweaty hugs. Gross!
26 August 2011, early evening
Elaine: Nope. I did not work for Disney. I just lived in Central Florida – Orlando and Oviedo at separate times; however, I have considered it. I have friends who work there.
I love playing in the rain and I love horses, but – as an adult – I haven't had much interaction with them, unfortunately. Picture of me on a horse when I was little: [broken link to Facebook picture].
I'm okay with swimming in lakes, rivers, the ocean, etc. I love swimming. But I am probably too much of a girly girl. I'm selective about what I like to do.
Omg I was a snooze fest! Is this an outdoorsy girl job interview? Why couldn’t I just say that I can’t be arsed with all that and I just like walking and a bit of hiking but I’m not going to be an ultra marathon logger? All I can say is he must have been hot and my messages are giving me too many “pick me” vibes.
27 August 2011, early evening
Leif: Define a"girly girl." Are you purely appearance driven? Would you want to dress me so I look exactly like your vision of what you want? Does it matter where I work, how much money I make, or what I do publicly?
I'm right there with you about being selective on what I do. I've wasted so much time and life on other people's ideas that I thought would come back to help me in some way. (Yeah, I'll be fully retired by 32.)
My biggest suggestion is that if I'm weeding a garden for you, building your dream home, fixing or maintaining your auto or anything mechanical or electrical, keep me company, show affection and appreciation and maybe keep me company.
I'm not super neat, tidy or sterile, but I'm not Pigpen or a college frat boy either.
You seem to be really a pretty cool person though and kinda cute as far as pictures go. More than anything, I'm looking for friends that could develop into more, and I do have an inexhaustible amount of men that I know that you might like one of if I'm not your type.
You do take very well to pictures. "Easy on the eyes" I think the expression is.
Is this giving red flag vibes as in he’s describing the type of girlfriend (or wife?) he had who did not want to be glued to him as he did tasks?
Elaine: I like to look nice. I enjoy clothes, shoes, and makeup. Do I want to dress the person I date? No. People are who they are from the beginning, so I've learned. And if I like a person as is, which includes how they dress, then I'll like them – if that makes sense. I don't care about jobs or money or cars. I have my own job and I make my own money. The reason I'm getting my Master's degree is because I want to be self-sufficient. I don't want to have to rely on someone else to have what I want in life, mainly travel. What someone does publicly may matter; such as, I care about table manners and what people say to others. I like to date someone who is polite, friendly, caring, charismatic, likeable, etc. I don't want to date someone who is angry, possessive, rude to others, etc.
Thanks for the compliment, but I don't think I'm all that photogenic, actually.
I'm big on hygiene, especially hand hygiene. I like to be clean; however, I'm not neat or tidy either. I hate laundry and dishes and I'm reluctant to do them – though, I do...eventually. I don't like filth, so I'll get to them before they create health hazards, of course.
And I'd be happy to have a new friend. I'm new to the area (i.e. I moved to Columbus last Monday for my new teaching job). My main goal lately is going to be focusing on my job and finishing my Master's thesis, but I'd be happy to see what kind of night life this town has at some point in the future.
And I feel like I'm spending too much time trying to explain to you why I'm not your version of a past female stereotype you've encountered…
Yep! I think I honestly summed my past self up here. Messy but physically hygienic. Learning lessons from the past. Focusing on the future.
Leif: I'm sorry I meant no offense. I was just asking. Yes, I have known people that would dress their significant other. The downtown and around town nightlife can be fun. The guy to girl ratio in Columbus is definitely in your favor.
Liking clothes, shoes, and those things are pretty normal for women. I have a pretty fair collection of boy stuff.
I'm sorry to have offended. Have a good weekend.
Elaine: Ha! You didn't offend me. I was being facetious.
Then, radio silence. Was I seeing someone else in the intervening four days and it didn’t work out or was I legit just busy?
31 August 2011, mid-afternoon
Elaine: So, are you game to hang out weekend after next? I really need to develop a social life here.
If you want to meet sooner, I hang out at Starbucks/Barnes and Noble most days around 3 or 4 to get my lessons planned, read for the classes I'm teaching, or work on my thesis. (I know. All of those things sound majorly fun.)
229 XXX XX74
Hope to hear from you.
- ElaineAlso, what's your name? That might be important ;)
Straight into it. Virtual stranger and I’m giving him my whereabouts. Thank goodness Penn Badgley’s character wasn’t a notion back then.
Leif: Oh good ;) I hate typed print sometimes. Those things do sound awesome and majorly fun ;) I'm always up for B&N.
My cell is 217 XXX XXXX.
And it's Leif...A pleasure to meet you, self proclaimed "Girly girl" (You know I do believe it was Kierkegaard that said "if you label me you negate me." Just saying.)
He’s a philosopher and a Viking now. Apparently, Kierkegaard didn’t even say that as explained in this Medium article.
After this very thrilling conversation upon which I learned approximately nothing except all I can hope was that he was hot and that’s why I was so willing to meet up with someone who clearly didn’t align with me. 2023 me can see that. It’s a shame 2011 me didn’t.
But I felt the need to email his text messages to myself in May of 2012. MAY! Why was I still thinking about this man I totally forgot in MAY?
Email from May 2012 of our texts from August 2011…
Nine months earlier… (sounds like a sort of pregnancy announcement where I’ve woken up one day with Leif’s baby but I don’t remember him or having a baby.)
31 August 2011
Elaine: Now I get the whole warrior woodsman but, Leif. This is Elaine. I'm at Barnes until 8 if you want to say hi. I'm getting kinda bored pretending to work.
Leif: Hi, this is Leif.
Leif: Ha! That's too funny. I texted as you were texting.
Leif: Yea? I'll come in then ;) do you work there?
Elaine: Ha no. I teach English. I work on my lessons here.
Not that there’s anything wrong with working at a bookshop as two of my favourite (hilarious and wonderfully written) Substacks are from people who work at bookshops:
(of It’ll Be Fun, They Said) and (of Terrible at Titles).Leif: I thought that's what you wrote, but suddenly I was confused.
Elaine: I moved near magazines. Had to turn my computer off. Have a headache. Also I don't look my best after being at work all day. Hope you get here soon.
Ah the glory days of print journalism when I read magazines.
Leif: I'll be on my way shortly. Gotta put the horse up for the night. Won't take long. Do you want me to bring you anything for your noggin?
Elaine: Tylenol or the like would be most kind. Thanks :) I hope I get to see your horse one day. I love horses.
Leif: I have almost anything for headaches you could want. Do you prefer Tylenol?
Elaine: I have no preference. I think it's all the same. Or maybe I'm ill informed. :)
Leif: I love horses as well. Technically I have two or more horses but I have the baby at the house with me.
I think if I’d met his horse I’d have remembered him.
Leif: It depends on the headache.
Elaine: It's eye strain.
Leif: Ugh! Those suck.
Elaine: Here's what to expect. Taken yesterday…
Guessing I sent a pic?
Leif: Yea, the "warrior woodsman" was a little corny. I thought I could change it.
Elaine: I think you can.
Leif: Really?!
Leif: With a name like Leif Eric [Surname] I kinda well.
Elaine: Wow your parents were fans of Norse myth, eh?
Leif: Dad might have been a little. It's oddly appropriate tho.
Leif: I'm impressed and pleased you know that, really glad you didn't jump to Leif Garret.
Elaine: Don't know who that is.
Still don’t know who that is. We didn’t have phones with Google back then.
Leif: I look rough, sorry.
Leif: Good.
Leif: 1970s teen idol old women always comment that they loved him.
Elaine: Hmm.
Elaine: I'm only here until 8. So hurry! I have dinner plans with roommate and I can't be late. Can't disappoint her more than twice in a week.
Dinner with Brittany! Wonder where we went.
Leif: You're not old tho so if you were into 70s teen rockish music it might be a lol odd. I'm getting close.
Leif: Passing Sears now.
Elaine: Ha. I am indeed not old. Had a lady that I was tutoring tell me I was too pretty to be a tutor which was insulting because it implies one shouldn't be smart if one is 'pretty' which is subjective anyway.
Leif: Thanks. For hanging out. You're pretty awesome.
Leif: So what Italian place are you guys going to?
Elaine: Switched to steak and shake. Britt and I have more lessons to plan so she doesn't want to spend ages eating.
Leif: Nice.
Leif: How fares Steak & shake & lesson planning?
Elaine: I ate a large quantity of food and lesson planning is boring. I want to sleep.
Leif: Same here. I'm passing out as we speak/text
Leif: Can't keep eyes straight.
Elaine: Aaww. Do you ride your horses?
Leif: Goodnight sweetheart ;) Oh and I kinda got flustered, so I didn't ask. Would you like to go to dinner or on a date? The baby is too young but the others yes.
Sweetheart? That escalated fast.
Elaine: I would like to go to dinner and/or on a date so yes :) How young is s/he?
1 September 2011
Leif: She is a year and a half. We kinda share a birthday (Raven my youngest horse)
Elaine: Ugh! I have to unload apartment things before work :(
Leif: Oh! That sucks.
Leif: How did lesson planning go last night?
Elaine: Yes it does. Hope I have time but I don't want to do it after class. It went fine. It's mostly done. I don't teach that class until 2 pm.
Elaine: Free for a quick bite at 3.15?
Leif: Yes.
Leif: Any place in particular?
Elaine: Some place that's on the way to my destination. So near an exit. Text an address and I will meet you :)
Leif: Ok. Are you thinking pizza or IHOP or a Ruby Tuesdays?
Elaine: Somewhere relatively quick. About half an hour. So neither of those.
Elaine: Done with unloading. Yay.
Elaine: How bad is it to drive with parking brake, exactly? Feel like idiot today.
Leif: Oh. Well. Yea. It's bad. It just ruins the parking brake.
Elaine: :(
Leif: It won't kill the car tho. U poor thing.
Elaine: I'm used to being a disaster. But a lucky disaster nonetheless.
Leif: Hey. I think you're doing pretty good ;)
Elaine: Now I look a mess. Ha. Ran into busiest McDonalds for Diet Coke now lost on Macon Rd. Can't find road I need. Will barely make it to class.
I had no idea past me drank Diet Coke because present me thinks Diet Coke is really gross and I recall past me supping up all the sugar in total “full fat” Coke! Also, I’m guessing we didn’t meet for that rushed bite to eat?
Leif: Oh no. Macon Road is one large road down from where you should be ;( you would have done better taking Manchester. Exit 7.
Elaine: I made it. Almost there.
Leif: Sweet. I like the oatmeal at mac d.
Elaine: Haha. Spoke too soon. Stuck in turn lane since roads here seem to turn into turn only lanes and this turns wrong direction.
Leif: Oh no.
Leif: Are u going to make it?
Elaine: I was late but it's ok.
Leif: Yea. You're the prof ;)
Elaine: Yep
Elaine: Figured out where you want to go for late lunch.
Leif: Are you headed home first or headed straight out from school?
Elaine: Straight from school.
Leif: Ok. So fast food? Or buffet?
Elaine: Eh. I like a limited number of fast food places. Sorry. I sound picky. And I'm not crazy about buffets. What do you fancy?
Leif: I don't really do fast food. And yea not a buffet person. But I'll literally eat anything. Do you like sushi?
Leif: I'm trying to keep us under 30 min for your timetable.
Elaine: I love Sushi and I can do up to 45.
Leif: Sushiko is just off of exit 6 (the east side of the interstate going towards Macon) is that cool? They have a great sushi bar.
Elaine: Can you give me an address with zip please?
Leif: [Address]
Leif: Hope that will do it ;)
Elaine: My gps will see. I finish teaching at 3.15.
Leif: Excellent.
Leif: How's class? I'm getting ready to head towards Sushiko.
Elaine: I would've kissed you but would prefer conditions where my breath doesn't smell like raw fish and onion and where I'm not glistening with perspiration.
Was this guy just company for lunch? Like any human company because I’d just moved?
Leif: I was very acutely aware of my breath myself. And was kicking myself for not having gum.
Leif: You smell great by the way. Not to sound odd.
Elaine: I dislike gum. Gelatinous!
Leif: ha! Yes it is ;)
I still dislike gum.
Elaine: Thanks. I don't know how but I always wear Coco Chanel perfume.
I still wear this too and Michael says it smells like “old lady perfume” but I still like it.
Leif: It's good.
Elaine: :)
Elaine: I'll leave it up to you to figure out something fun for us to do next time ;)
Leif: Definitely.
Elaine: Points for spelling definitely right. I'd love to hang out or you can see me doing boring things at Starbucks.
Am I in an episode of Line of Duty? The Starbucks episode? “Definately high risk.”
Elaine: Boo. Still over an hour left :(
Leif: U poor thing. I might just come see you doing boring stuff.
Leif: Sorry in Applebees with my buddie Steven.
Elaine: Totally fine. Have fun. Was just calling to chat.
Leif: I will. I have fun chatting with you as well.
Elaine: :P
Elaine: What's this overdrive button do?
Leif: Ha! You don't need it. It's for racing. Keeps it from going into overdrive.
Elaine: But if I press it what does it do?
Elaine: Back in town. Fuck yes! Roads I recognize. Ha.
Leif: Yea!!!
2 September 2011
Elaine: Morning
Leif: Good morning sunshine. ;) how's home?
Ffs did I sleep with this man and have no recollection? Was he an alien who erased my memory? Or did I just travel somewhere? Did I just sleep over? Was he at my house?
Elaine: I missed my lovely bed.
Leif: That is a very lovely room.
Leif: Wow. What a lovely room. You've decorated amazingly.
Elaine: I try
My apartment bedroom wasn’t decorated amazingly…
Leif: You excel
Elaine: Much needed mani pedi
[Leif sends picture]
I didn’t even have an iPhone then so I’m guessing these were tiny, silly flip phone pics.
Leif: A long long 6 years ago.
Leif: Sorry almost 7
[These are the profile pictures he has used]
Elaine: You're still as cute.
[Leif sends another picture]
I wrote these notes to myself too in brackets.
Elaine: That's my haircut.
Leif: I gain weight when I'm stressed.
Leif: Nice. I like your style.
[Leif sends a shirtless picture]
Leif: Are you as much fun as you appear to be?
Elaine: No. I'm no fun. :P
Elaine: Also you have excuse to gain when you get shot in the spine and have surgery. You don't look fat.
Leif: That's kinda true. I blame my ex more ;)
Insecurity with the weight gain comment? Red flag with the ex comment?
Elaine: Why?
Leif: I'm the one on the right.
Leif: Why what?
Elaine: I don't see anything yet.
Elaine: Why do you blame your ex?
[He sends me a picture of him as a pretty fat guy – saying before the breakup – and a picture of him pretty toned and thin – before they dated]
E: Nice :)
L: Massive stress. Long story. She literally was/is trying to make my life hell. She even openly says so.
E: What role do you play in this?
E: What I mean is, these things are never one sided.
E: Do you have Facebook?
L: Um. I stopped catering to her every whim after she refused to live with me and left me to stay with her mom post baby birthing. And after she took him and got him baptized in Michigan but said she was in Georgia at her apt watching TV. And sex stopped at month 4.5 of pregnancy when she passed out heart stopped and no breath for two min and she wouldn't go to see a doctor. I got mad after 5 weeks of begging her to seek med help.
But she would rather just do her thing and stay training as an engineer in the army, blowing things up, running daily, shooting things, she was too busy to be bothered with a dr. I got mad told her she was being neglectful and then she decided I had betrayed her trust. Her mom and family turned on me because I'm a recovering cynical catholic. Her family (mom) is Lutheran, and kinda make up what they consider good and holy and consider me a sacrilegious sinner. I drink, and so much more and she doesn't like my family. Like I said there is so much more, but it's well a long story. Oh not organized enough and not as sterile. I'm a scatterbrained daydreamer. She reads romance novels; I read classic lit and lots of science and Tex stuff.
L: They are never one sided. I do have many flaws and issues. But I gave her my everything, pampered and spoiled her and in the end I was the one who always compromised and routinely my wants, dreams, plans, and ideas were shunned and neglected and she eventually filed for divorce and refused to allow me to see my son. The custody as she filed was set to be decided there and on the day of my surgery.
E: Wow. I'm sorry to hear that. You know I'm an atheist right?
L: Yea. It's why I messaged you. Well, one reason ;)
E: Ha. Is it? What other reasons? Well I was just worried when you said you were Catholic. Ha.
L: Recovering Catholic.
E: Ha.
L: I'm a dyslexic, agnostic, insomniac. I lay away at night wondering if there really is a Dog.
E: Ha. Wow. You aren't really insomniac are you?
Pretty sure he was making a joke and I was dim and also didn’t know how to reply to his outpouring of emotional pain.
L: When her and I started out she agreed with me that organized religion is almost a cancer of modern existence and that it allows people to live their lives without personal ownership, yet makes people inherently distrust themselves but allows them the peace of mind and forgiveness in exchange for $
L: No, not really agnostic either ;)
E: Ha.
3 September 2011
E: Possibly hang out later?
L: I've got my little boy.
E: Hope you have fun.
L: Would you like to meet him?
E: If you are ok with that I am.
L: We are going to nap then I'll let you know. Would you like to come over?
E: I won't be available until ten or so. I'm driving then unpacking.
L: Ok. Little one should be asleep by then... maybe
E: Ha. I'd hope.
E: Also depends on how tired I am. Packing and unpacking is not fun.
L: No. Not at all it's exhausting.
E: I really want a shower and a gallon of had water.
L: Had water?
E: Ice. ha. Using t9. Over an hour left. Then two or so hours of unloading.
Here I go texting and driving again and then texting using T9. It must have been when I was driving my un-air conditioned car from Valdosta to Columbus (a 3.5-hour journey) with moving boxes and my cats.
L: Ugh! Poor thing.
E: Finishing unloading about 30 mins ago. Now I don't feel like unpacking :(
L: Ugh. No fun. I'm not done either.
E: How long have you been in your place?
E: Sorry. Won't make it tonight too tired.
L: It's ok. Since November. ;)
E: ?
4 September 2011
L: I've had my place since November. And we went to bed shortly after 1030. He and I were both exhausted.
E: We went to Albany today to see Brittany's grandmother. Just got back. I'm tired! Maybe we can hang out later?
5 September 2011
E: You kinda disappeared. Everything ok?
L: Yes. Sorry. Playing with lil boy. Btw you are super hot.
E: Ha. Thanks. I'm shopping at Target. Sorry for bothering you :) hope you're having fun.
E: Want to see me later? What's your son's name btw?
L: His name is Gabriel. I'm not happy with his mom right now sorry.
E: That's fine. I'm sorry for pestering you. I just enjoyed your company and had hoped to see you again :) but I understand if you don't want that right now.
I wonder how many times we saw each other and I’m guessing we had to talk on the phone. I used to prefer phone calls back then. Now I will run a mile if someone tries to ring me instead of WhatsApp me.
L: No, not pestering. And god I hope to see you again. I just share a child with a crappy ex.
E: It is likely I'll be at Starbucks tomorrow.
6 September 2011
L: What time are you Starbucking?
E: I get off around 3.30, but I have to go to HR, Target, and to buy veg. Mind showing me best place to buy fresh veg besides Publix? You can also come to my messy place.
E: About to head to Starbucks [unsent message]
E: I'm at Starbucks now if you want to meet.
L: I just picked up a friend that I almost forgot was visiting from Germany. I'm so sorry. I completely forgot.
L: Will you ever be able to forgive me? I will make it up to you.
E: I think I will manage. It would've been nice to see a friendly face, though. Brittany's at work and I'm just bored and tired.
7 September 2011
L: I'm sorry sweetheart.
E: What are you doing today?
E: I'll be at Starbucks soon. As usual ;)
8 September 2011
Twin besties, Sarah and Anna’s, birthday.
L: I'm sorry I'm so busy. I haven't seen my friend for so long. I'll be a lil outa the loop for a bit. How is school?
E: It's going. I wouldn't ordinarily bother you. I'd wait for you to contact me. But I guess I was a little too eager to make new friends in the area. Take all the time you need. Hope things are well for you.
L: Oh. I'm so happy to know you and I can't wait to be able to hang out again.
E: Sarcasm?
L: No. I don't almost kiss and want to kiss people I don't like. You are cool as shit. You really need to hang out with us at the house someday soon.
E: Invite me and I'll come. I mean, it's not like I'm booked up at the moment. I'm at Starbucks again. Ha. I need to do thesis work this weekend, though but I'm going to try out a bar Friday.
Way too desperate but the fact that we “almost kissed” definitely means we did not have sex. Thank goodness for that! I’d have to re-evaluate my entire life.
9 September 2011
E: Available for a very quick dinner on me?
19 days later…if only it was 28 days later…like that film…
28 September 2011
L: Hey you. I'm finally back in the States. How are you?
Back in the States? Had he told me somewhere that he was leaving it?
E: I'm ok. And you?
L: I'm alive. Tired but ok. I missed you. So what all have I missed?
E: Honestly, I figured you weren't interested and I started seeing someone else.
L: No worries. I'd love to hang out if that's still an option. I had to leave for a while. Sorry.
E: We can still hang out. Sure. But you kinda disappeared.
L: I know. Sorry. I can't wait til I'm retired.
And that was that. A whole person I don’t recall.
Next up, the army sergeant who went down on me.
Don’t forget to check out the other thirty-four posts I’ve written, including the one on why I’m writing this newsletter/blog in the first place – and the odd “present day snippet” of what I’m up to lately.
This scenario makes me wonder how many other bits of my life have I blanked and why? I’m sure you can’t tell me if you’ve ever dated someone you have forgotten but do you think you’ve ever lost memories or learned you misremembered something? How did that make you feel? Let me know in the comments.
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