BONUS MATERIAL: THE HOT JEWISH DOCTOR’S OKCUPID DATING PROFILE

Subject line: Doctor’s OkCupid Profile – and some more random emails I sent him

Email to myself on Wednesday, 2 November 2011. If you read this profile, I hope you can see what drew me to him initially, and if you read our initial messages, I think it’s easy to see why a lost 24-year-old would gravitate towards this successful 36-year-old man who seemed to have his shit together.

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Photo by Sincerely Media on Unsplas

You last contacted him on September 8, 2011.

His Details

Last Online: Oct 25

Ethnicity: White

Height: 6′ 1” [I misremembered him as taller – sorry, reader, not intentionally misleading anyone on these posts. Eek! I erroneously added two inches to his height but he was a big man!]

Body Type: Athletic

Diet: —

Smokes: No

Drinks: Socially

Drugs: Never

Religion: Judaism and laughing about it

Sign: Leo

Education: Graduated from med school

Job: Medicine / Health

Income: Rather not say

Children: —

Pets: Likes dogs and dislikes cats [Why didn’t I see this as a red flag? I had TWO cats.]

Speaks: English

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My self-summary

100 characters to describe one's life...

Ok, so I am single again and I removed some funny stuff so this is a tad less insane. Here's a cut and paste from an old online profile, so bear with me. I tried to be funny, yet honest.

Moved here from Hawaii a tad over a year ago, but I am from Florida (national champs - woot!). I have a nice job in the medical field, but am also trying to turn a hobby into another job (you will have to ask) – but I am no longer distributing my "classy nudes" so please don't ask, I just needed money for college. I have been divorced for several years (the bitterness has faded) and have no children. I do have all my teeth in their proper places and in their correct order too. And they are only a little yellow...

I am a fun person who has no shame when it comes to making people laugh. I am willing to try most things once to see if they are fun.

What I have learned from online dating:

1. I now recognize "playing the angles" i.e. you look good from only one angle so all of your pics are clear at that angle and fuzzy otherwise.

2. People are often more funny, more interesting and better looking online than in real life. That is unfortunate. I want someone who is actually more funny, interesting and attractive in real life.

3. I look younger, better and taller in real life. This is fortunate. Well for me at least. Maybe for you.

4. Some people will "spray and pray." i.e. same uninteresting email to fifty people and hope one replies. I don't do this and receiving one of these emails doesn’t interest me. And I like to be interested because I am interesting. And funny. And humble. Oh wait. Hmmm... I’ll have to think about that last one.

5. Women on here get a ton of emails that basically say "Holla back!" I am a) too old to know what holla means and b.) I speak english good. And I write it even better. I guess that because I am not weird and trollish and have a decent job I get the same-style emails from women (and sometimes dudes that now look like them). If I don’t reply, I am not being rude, I am just not interested. Don't hate!

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